Tell me a story

I think there is a lot to be said about stories. I had a professor who sat down before the finals and had a heart to heart with us (ironically had heart surgery during the semester) and told us some points of wisdom that he had taken into his own life. One of the things that he told us that has always stuck with me was not to believe our own "propaganda." At first I thought, "humpf, the Nazi's used propaganda, not me." I've thought a lot over the years about what propaganda means. The Nazi's created a story about why their great nation was defeated in World War I. It provided a convenient excuse to collectively gather hatred for a people through nothing more than a story that they swore to themselves that it was true. Many times we tell ourselves stories and swear that they are true. Often times we tell ourselves stories when we are victorious. We also create the story of why we were defeated. Usually the refs cheat, but anyway. We justify our behavior. I had a bad childhood which created a story that justifies my actions. And so the propaganda machine kicks in to place. I have met many a young lady that I convinced myself that she would not date me. I gave elaborate stories of why she would not want to date a poor, bald guy from the west side of dubious sordid heritage. It was true and you COULD NOT convince me otherwise. What was it based on? nothing. Story created by all the feedback that I interpreted from the world. If there were 3 pluses and 1/2 of a negative, that negative was larger than life itself. I see this in my little sister Sammie. "Sammie your so beautiful, such beautiful hair, get your grades up a little." What, you sayin' I'm stupid? is the response. I myself have come to terms with this scenario in the Eastern philosophy of the ying and the yang. There are two sides to the ying and the yang. The black and the white, the positive and the negative, whatever it is you assign to it, it is always polar opposites. The white and the black are treated as a whole. You can choose to dwell and focus on the negative side or choose to live in the positive. But all the while the good and the bad making up the whole.

In the legal world the story comes in the form of the facts. Taking a fact such as a punch could be anything from a vicious physical assault to incidental contact to dude, you face jumped in front of my fist. The art of the lawyer is telling a good story. They tell the story through witnesses and exhibits. I have a final trial coming up, can you tell?

Unfortunately, the story is feed to us from different channels. I had a dear friend who took a undeserved beating from people who did not know her. The took bits and pieces of the story and passed judgements. Many times we see a situation and say "that isn't right," with a little story that we can see. People have a tendency to fill in the gaps with their own "story." Many times people are so convinced by their "rightness" that other view points and not considered. Hence, growth, compassion, understanding ceases.

One of my siblings tells herself a story that is not true. It keeps her small in the world. How do you change someones story so that the choose to see the positive, instead of letting the weight of all the negative keep her in their shit? It's an individual decision I guess.

What is your story? What is the story you tell yourself?

The Dean of students has a little thing that he says at orientation. "When you talk to yourself make sure you are saying the right things." It has been one of the greatest thing to learn in law school. Say the right things to yourself.

As for now, I will tell you a story of a man who fights and struggles constantly. Who celebrates the small victories of life. Who is constantly afraid and brave. Who feels mediocre and inadequate on a daily basis. I will also tell you of a man who lives his dream.